Goal Ideas for Toddlers and Preschoolers

It's never too early for our children to start setting goals. As long as they can grasp the concept of deciding what they want, determining how to achieve it, and taking action, they can benefit from goal setting. It's fine if they need a little help and encouragement from parents.

Goals for children this young often consist of learning new things. But it's also great for them to set goals regarding behavior, trying new things, and helping others. A variety of goals will help them broaden their horizons.

What Kinds of Goals Can Toddlers and Preschoolers Set?

Early childhood is a time when children are exploring and learning about the world around them. Helping your toddler or preschooler set goals about learning new things is a great way to introduce him to goal setting. Here are some ideas:

* Early reading goals are great for this age group. Toddlers can make learning the alphabet song one of their goals. Once they have accomplished that, they could learn the letters by sight. Preschoolers can set a goal of learning to write their names and the names of family members.

* Learning new games and songs may not seem like much of a goal to an adult, but to a preschooler it can be a really big deal. The most important thing about setting goals at this stage is learning how to do so effectively and gaining motivation.

* Learning to tie shoes, button clothes, and do other things that we do in everyday life make good goals. Kids need to know these things by the time they get to kindergarten, so having them set goals pertaining to them can motivate them to try hard.

Behavioral goals can include things as simple as saying please and thank you at appropriate times. Tasks related to keeping a child's room clean and picking up after himself also make good goals. But it's important to remember to start small with small children.

Some children are resistant to trying new foods. Encouraging them to set a goal of trying one new food each week can help them overcome their fear of the unknown. Of course this is also a good way to promote healthier eating.

Potty training is a goal of every parent of a toddler. This should also be a goal of the child when he is ready, but it's important not to push it before that time comes. For most goals, achievement should be its own reward. But this is one goal that definitely calls for celebration when achieved.

Early childhood is a great time for children to start setting goals. If they begin early, goal setting could become second nature. And that would be a tremendous asset to their success throughout life.

The No-Cry Discipline Solution Book Review

New Mom Product Review: The No-Cry Discipline Solution: Gentle Ways to
Encourage Good Behavior Without Whining, Tantrums, and Tears


Description: I think The No-Cry Discipline Solution is a valuable book for all parents. It turns discipline into a positive experience for parent and child and that is no small feat. Unlike many parenting books that leave parents feeling confused and inadequate, this book leaves you with a sense that you can reach your child. It teaches you how too discipline lovingly, creating a peaceful home environment for everyone.

Review: Disciplining children is arguably one of the hardest skills for parents to learn. As a parent herself, Elizabeth Pantley knows what a challenge it is to establish good discipline, and she shares the hard-won wisdom of her experience with parents in this latest edition to her revolutionary "no-cry" approach to parenting. In this case, we have no doubt she's saving parents from tears, too! Elizabeth Pantley's approach to this age-old problem is unique because she doesn't rely on old discipline models that often make parents feel like the bad guy. Instead, she gives parents the communication tools they need to stop bad behavior in its tracks and gain a deeper understanding of what triggers a child to act out. Any parent will appreciate the focus on love and nurturing in this wholly practical and much-needed addition to the child care shelf.

Pantley takes us on an important journey to help us find ease and comfort as parents. She first dispels many parenting and discipline myths that often leave parents confused and feeling inadequate. By learning about these myths and acknowledging that they exist in your life you can then move forward and learn effective new ways to raise your children.

I think this book is a good read for all parents and especially those that are sometimes frustrated with how they see themselves interacting with their children. Parenting skills and discipline skills can always be improved upon and this book is a great place to start. By following Pantley's advice more parents can find ways to discipline without tears, with less frustration, and with more peace among all members of the family.

Looking for The No-Cry Discipline Solution Book? You can find it here:
The No-Cry Discipline Solution: Gentle Ways to Encourage Good Behavior Without Whining, Tantrums, and Tears (Pantley)

Choosing A Baby Name

You have just found out that you will become new parents in nine months. There is a lot of preparing to do, not the least of which is choosing a baby name for the new addition to the family. The name that is chosen follows your child throughout his life, making the decision a very important one.

When choosing a name for your newborn boy or girl, a few things need to be considered. First, how will the name sound? Everyone wants to be unique. If the name is hard for you to pronounce, even if it is cute, that’s a sure sign that your child is headed for trouble later in life. No one likes their name pronounced every way but the right way.

Some parents like more common names, but they change the spelling to change the look of the name on paper. Megan as the traditional spelling may not look as good as Meghan or Meggan. Faith doesn’t look as unique as Fayth. While the alternative spellings may look better, think about your child. Will they remember how to spell their name and will others know as well?

The alternative spelling phenomenon is more common among girls’ names, but some boys names fall under this category. For instance, there is the name Shawn. It has been spelled Shawn, Shaun, and Sean. The last one used to be the hardest to pronounce correctly because of the missing “h”.

People remember names that flow well. This doesn’t mean that the first, middle, and last names have to rhyme. That is a bit too much flow. Instead, choose each name so that it compliments the surname. For example, John Smith has a one syllable first and last name. If your last name is long and hard to pronounce, choosing a shorter first name is better. It’s not only easier to say, but easier to write and read.

Another thing to consider is nicknames. A name that can be shortened will be shortened by other kids when your child reaches school age. Traditional names like Benjamin or Steven, are shortened pretty easy. A name like Stuart will be shortened to Stu. If you don’t like the nicknames or shortened versions, another name could be the solution. This goes for girls’ names as well. The last thing any parent wants is to open their child up for ridicule from other kids.

Who knew that choosing a baby name involved so much work? With so many choices for names floating around in the ether today, parents have to do a bit more searching to find the perfect one to fit their child. Start early so there’s time to come up with a list of promising names that you can then narrow down until you find the perfect name for your new bundle of joy.

Need baby name ideas? Check out
The Complete Book of Baby Names

What Is Attachment Parenting

There are a lot of different philosophies out there about how to raise your children. One of more popular parenting philosophies that’s been publicized in the past few years is attachment parenting. Many people don’t understand exactly what it is. Attachment parenting is when the parents try to form a close, special bond with their children. This strong relationship with their parents is said to help a child develop strong, healthy, secure relationships in the future.

While there are many ways to develop these strong bonds with young children, Attachment Parenting International, a major proponent of this philosophy, has released a list of 8 ideals for attachment parents. It is important to realize that these are something to strive for, not something most people can actually accomplish in their hectic lives. The ideals they give are:

* Preparation for Childbirth. This involves educating yourself so you can be an active participant in your pregnancy and delivery. An active parent should take classes and strive to make important decisions early. A mother should also try to keep stress on the baby low during pregnancy.

* Emotional Responsiveness. This is probably the most important philosophy in attachment parenting. It involves being aware of and fulfilling your child’s emotional needs. It stresses comforting your baby when they cry instead of letting them “cry it out” on their own. A parent should develop the ability to interpret and fulfill your child’s needs by spending quality time with them.

* Breastfeeding. Breastfeeding is not only the most nutritious diet possibly for babies; it also promotes bonding between the mother and child through closeness and also hormonal reactions. Attachment parenting encourages breastfeeding until the mother and the baby are both ready to stop. It also advocates breastfeeding behaviors even if you’re bottle feeding your baby.

* Baby Wearing. Wearing your baby in a sling can have many positive benefits. It allows your child to feel safe and secure, stimulates their neurological development, and helps stabilize their biorhythms. It also brings a sense of closeness between the wearer and the baby.

* Shared Sleep. Sleeping in a bed with the parents can make a child feel safe and secure at night because their needs are being met. If a baby has to cry for a while before a parent arrives, it can shatter their feeling of nighttime security. With co-sleep, mom is always there to respond to needs immediately. It also make breastfeeding easier and further strengthens that bond.

* Avoiding long separations from your baby. Try not to be away from your baby for too long. This can emotionally damage a child and the bond you have with them. If long absences are unavoidable, try to find one consistent caregiver who will treat your child as you normally would, ensuring continuity of care.

* Positive discipline. Attachment parenting stressed forming a strong bond with your child which helps them to trust you. If they have this trust, you can guide them to make good choices by making them yourselves. You should keep this trust by trying to understand and empathize with your child’s point of view.

* Balance your family life. This involves not only being there for your family, but also being there for yourself. Someone who has a solid support structure and cares for themselves will be better equipped to care for their family as well.

While it times it may be difficult to follow all these ideals, if you strive to reach at least some of them, you will likely have a happy, independent, and well adjusted child.

Further Reading:
The Attachment Parenting Book : A Commonsense Guide to Understanding and Nurturing Your Baby

Wordless Wednesday

How to Deal With Picky Eaters

It's exciting when your toddler starts eating solid foods. You get to introduce her to lots of new things. There will be foods she likes and ones that she doesn't. But many toddlers develop an aversion to new foods or only want to eat one certain food at every meal. This often happens around the infamous "terrible twos." Some parents fear that their child will not get proper nutrition if they are picky eaters.

What many parents don't realize is that toddlers do not need to eat as much as you might think. Growth slows down around two years of age, often resulting in a decrease in appetite. So your active two year old might fill up with just a few bites.

A lack of fruits and vegetables in the diet is also a source of concern for lots of parents. These food groups are trouble spots for many toddlers, and they do contain lots of healthy nutrients. But as long as the child is growing normally, there is usually no need to worry.

Introducing New Foods

It is not uncommon for a child to refuse to eat new foods. But if you offer a food consistently, your toddler will be more likely to try it eventually. Putting a small amount of the food you want her to try on her plate a couple of times each week will usually result in her taking a bite at some point.

Another approach is to ask your toddler to try one bite of a new food. Knowing that she only has to take a single bite makes it less intimidating. If she says she doesn't like it, wait a few days and ask her to try a bite again. If after two or three times she still doesn't like the food, it's time to move on. Keep trying foods in the group she is lacking in until you find something she does enjoy.

Eating the foods you are trying to get your toddler to eat is a good way of teaching by example. Be sure to let her know how much you enjoy them. If she doesn't see other family members eating the foods that she sees on her plate, she won't be interested in trying them for herself.

Get Your Toddler Involved

Letting your toddler choose between items in the same food group makes her feel like her opinion matters. You could even let her choose some healthy foods at the grocery store. If it is her idea, she will be more likely to try it with an open mind.

Letting your child help cook is another way to get her involved in her food choices, and even young toddlers can somewhat help in the kitchen. A recipe book with pictures will allow you to choose recipes together. You can go to the store together and get the ingredients, then come home and prepare the dish. Kids are usually eager to try things that they helped make.

Picky eating is a frequent source of friction between toddlers and their parents. Setting a good example with your eating habits and casually but consistently introducing new foods may help your child broaden her horizons. If not, take comfort in the fact that picky eating is usually a phase that your child will outgrow.

What To Do When Your Child No Longer Believes In Santa

It happens to all of us, whether we want it to or not, we grow up and so do our children. The day will come when they lose that wide-eyed wonder about Christmas and Santa Claus. It seems like kids are outgrowing him younger every year.

So what do you do when a child asks the dreaded question, "Is there really a Santa Claus?" While you don't want to lie to your children, they may not be ready to let go of that part of childhood.

One approach is to just tell them the truth. Tell them the history of Saint Nick, and the origins of the traditions surrounding him. Read "'Twas The Night Before Christmas" which dates back to 1823 and explain how we get a lot of our modern ideas about Santa Claus from that poem. You can go on to explain that some grownups pretend to be Santa Claus, like an actor on a TV show, to keep the tradition alive as a fun part of the holidays.

Sometimes kids hear the truth about Santa from older siblings, cousins or school friends. They come home and ask about Santa. You have to decide if you're going to tell them the truth or wait awhile. If you continue to let them believe in Santa, they may go back and tell the others that they are wrong, possibly even call them a liar. The kids could counter with the fact that their parents are the ones who are lying.

Another approach is to answer their question about Santa with your own question. Ask them, "Well, what do you think?" Let them go through the process of deciding for themselves if Santa is real or not. Many kids will surprise you with their thought process of figuring out Santa. Children as young as four can figure out that reindeer can't fly.

If a child deals well with the transition to no Santa Claus, you have to decide what to do if there are younger siblings still in the house. You could tell your children about the traditions. You could let the older sibling help play Santa. This way they are still involved in the fun and feel all grown up because they are in on it. The child could get to stay up a little later and help put things in the stockings and leave gifts under the tree from Santa. You might even let them have some of the milk and cookies. Some families even have a letter from Santa, thanking the child for the snack. Let the older sibling write (or type) the letter.

Different children mature at different times, so that question may need to be answered sooner than you think. However, some families have told their children from the beginning about Santa to avoid the "trauma" of finding out the truth. If you've been teaching them about real and fantasy from the beginning, through stories and movies, the transition will be less traumatic, for you and them.

The Benefits of Breastfeeding

We live in a bottle feeding society. Many mother’s not only find bottle feeding more convenient, they have also been led to believe that feeding formula is somehow better for them and their baby. This information is flat out wrong. The benefits of breastfeeding for you and your baby generally far outweigh any risks or problems you may face.

The most obvious and also most numerous benefits from breastfeeding are to the baby directly from breast milk. No only does breast milk contain the exact nutritional requirements for your baby, it has numerous other positives as well, including:

* Boosts the immune system. Most of the immunities a baby has comes from the mother’s breast milk. Not only does the milk in general contain materials to help fight infection, it is actually tailored to what the mother is exposed to (i.e. what the baby is probably exposed to). This means your child gets custom protection from the diseases they face. Not only do breastfed babies get sick less, they are also less likely to develop immune disorders or allergy related diseases, including asthma.

* Helps proper physical development. Breastfed babies gain more weight than formula fed babies at the beginning, but that tapers off. Studies have shown that breastfed babies are less likely to be obese.

* Helps proper mental development. Breast milk helps to keep babies in a more alert state, which contributes to proper brain development.

While you may consider bottle feeding breast milk, you should be aware that the simple act of breast feeding also has benefits to your child, including:

* Increased bonding. Being close and connected to your child makes them feel safer with you and bond to you more.

* Promotes good oral health. Not only does breastfeeding prevent bottle tooth decay, it could also keep your child from having to wear braces in the future.

* Improves hand eye coordination. This is especially true if you switch sides and positions regularly.

In addition to being beneficial to your baby, breastfeeding can provide benefits to you as well, including:

* Less Hemorrhaging. Mothers who formula feed have to be given medicine after birth to shrink the uterus and prevent dangerous hemorrhaging. Nursing mother’s produce this chemical naturally.

* Less stress. Breast feeding has been shown to decrease the incidence of illness in babies. Dealing with a healthy baby is much easier than having to deal with a sick baby.

* Birth control. Consistent breast feeding has been shown to be effective in preventing ovulation. This effect may also help prevent breast, ovarian, and uterine cancers.

* Weight loss. Producing breast milk burns up a lot of calories. Mothers who nurse have been shown to take off the pregnancy weight faster.
* Increased bonding. In addition to helping your baby bond with you, breastfeeding produces hormones that help you bond better with your baby.

While breastfeeding is usually best, there are some instances where formula may be the better choice. The first of these is if you test positive for diseases that can be transmitted through breast milk. You should talk to your doctor about the risks and benefits of breast feeding in these cases. The second reason for bottle feeding is if you take certain medications of illegal drugs. Again, you should speak to your doctor in this situation.

Overall, breastfeeding can be a rewarding and beneficial experience for you and your baby.

Wordless Wednesday

Oh' Christmas Tree


Brownie Feeling Outdoorsy

Should your Teen Still Get an Allowance?

To answer the question should your teen still get an allowance, you would have to start from the time they were toddlers. Children receive monetary gifts for birthdays, holidays, and graduations. Hopefully, they have put this money away for their college education. However, parents teach responsibility to their children by setting up an allowance structure for completing chores, taking out the dog, helping with laundry, or cleaning their room.

An allowance these days may average $1.00 to $5.00 depending upon the chore completed. A child may put the money in their piggy bank and eventually, with the parent’s help, open up a bank account. Eventually, as the child grows, your teen may ask to use the money to buy an electronic toy or CD or a more expensive item such as an iPod or Xbox. If you’ve taught your child the value of money by example, your teen may not be so inclined to buy every new gadget that comes out.

If all of the prerequisite components of teaching responsibility on how to handle money have taken hold, then there is no need to continue with the allowance structure per se. It may be more prudent to undertake a new level of responsibility, which is to provide that which the teen needs more than wants.

While some teens apply for summer jobs to help them with expenses, others may not. Does this mean the family bank is still open to them? Hopefully, not. If your teen wants to buy the latest gadget, the best way to handle it is to lend the money, and explain the terms of the loan. This is the only way your teen will understand the value of a dollar, and will come to terms with the fact that you will not simply shell out money every time your teen asks.

While there are some teens that scrimp and save, others see money as an opportunity to buy the latest fashions, including sneakers, which cost a bundle to begin with. So too, fashion sense and peer pressure go hand in hand. Consequently, your teen may begin to withdraw money from the savings account. But, at some point, your teen will run out of money and come running to you.

Here is when you have to be firm and adamant in your assessment of your teen’s needs, and discuss financial responsibility in an open and honest forum. Once your teen understands the terms under which you will honor the request, your teen may not be in such a hurry to buy an expensive item the next time.

Should your teen still get an allowance? Honestly, no.